Category: sharing my heart
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you will not be bitter
Even when you see it coming, falling into a painful season of life is miserable. Muscles can’t grow unless they break. Flowers can’t grow without dirt. But despite how many black-and-white mugs we desperately grasp with sayings like this, filled with coffee in the morning and wine and whatever time it becomes acceptable, it doesn’t…
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always, things will be well.
In this waiting space, most of my thoughts don’t end with a conclusion. I have started so many hope-laced fragments that have lacked an ending, but not direction. Each night as I settle in, I find myself so far from where I start. Some days, nothing can kill my hope, and others, I fall asleep…
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it’s not you, it’s me: living in a high-risk pregnancy
To the well-meaning stranger who asks when my baby is due: there is a reason I avert my eyes. I instinctively touch the head of my 2-year-old as you ask the age gap. You remark how full my hands will be, and I hope you are right; full hands is the goal. But just in…
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i am not brave
I am not brave, not by myself. I didn’t choose this. I do this because I have to. There is so much I don’t know, but I do know that everything always works for good. His good is not in earthly terms. I know impossible things happen. I also know impossible good doesn’t always…
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when words fail
It is June, somehow. I feel like I am poking my head out of a warped cavity of time, realizing what has passed by. Enough emotions to fill years, since Easter of 2019, my world has been shifting sharply. A surprise pregnancy in February left me open and vulnerable in a way I had not…
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a letter to myself, before motherhood
I have always been enchanted by observation. Somber moments of self-reflection are something that came instinctually to me early in life, as I sat in the bathtub and wondered how I could be sure that I wasn’t the only real person on Earth. (That was a tough one. ) Every time a significant life…
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don’t fear failure: one second matters
The person I have the hardest time reasoning with is myself. I can work to convince my inner self not to try for something; but when that something is genuinely is something I need, I can’t get it out of my heart. When I hear that something echoing in my head when I fall…
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spring cleaning for your soul
I’ve got springtime on the mind. It looks like we may make it out of Daylight Savings alive. I am yearning for the first forsythia buds to peek through. I can’t resist the freshness of melting snow. With springtime comes newness; it also provides an annual reminder to clean and declutter my life. Just typing…
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i am doing what i can
If you’ve been around the internet for more than 10 minutes, you’ve likely run into people complaining about the state of the world today. Apparently kids these days are just the worst, although I happen to disagree. Because we have information available 24/7, the fallacy that things are worse than ever is easy to accept…
my western nest 