Tag: mama
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For Cooper: tomorrow is your due date
Tomorrow is your due date; I instinctively suspected we wouldn’t make it that far once we first got the news. It’s the date I recited before each weekly ultrasound, echoing with familiarity as I watched your fluid levels drop with each measurement. It’s the date I circled in my planner, back before we knew, which…
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always, things will be well.
In this waiting space, most of my thoughts don’t end with a conclusion. I have started so many hope-laced fragments that have lacked an ending, but not direction. Each night as I settle in, I find myself so far from where I start. Some days, nothing can kill my hope, and others, I fall asleep…
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a letter to myself, before motherhood
I have always been enchanted by observation. Somber moments of self-reflection are something that came instinctually to me early in life, as I sat in the bathtub and wondered how I could be sure that I wasn’t the only real person on Earth. (That was a tough one. ) Every time a significant life…
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to my spirited child
I was destined to have a spirited child; I was one myself. When my tiny newborn girl was placed in my arms four short years ago, I saw myself. I knew her. She proclaimed her presence proudly to that hospital floor; she was earth-side, and she had a lot to say. She was given a…
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mama: sometimes, you gotta say yes
Do you ever surprise yourself? I am not only referring to what you can accomplish but also, in how you treat yourself. Have you ever been presented with an opportunity that sounds wonderful, but instead of thinking of ways to make it happen, you start thinking of how you’re going to say no? Yea, me…
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smile at your baby
“A smile is the universal welcome.” Max Eastman When Gracie was first born, I was forced to come to terms with how scared I was to be a mom again. I was learning to parent with a heart that knew the sting of massive loss. In a way, I was a first-time mom, but I…
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seeking to bloom
Life now feels simple most days, but this hasn’t always been the case. In this, it’s easy for me to recognize that we currently in a time of abundance. We love our home, our little family is healthy and strong, we have more than we need to live well, and our marriage is solid. This…
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i know i will miss this
So much of what I thought about being a mom before I was a mom turned out to be false. For example, before I had kids, I didn’t know a particular cliché would stir up so much confusion and doubt for me. In fact, I thought it would be easy to graciously accept this reminder,…
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because the laundry never stops
I love Seinfeld. When I was on bedrest 5 years ago, I filled time by playing Seinfeld trivia regularly on my phone. I got pretty (pretty, pretty) good. The repetition of the questions made the most intricate details form the show stick with me. For example, Jerry’s phone number is “KL5-8383.” There is a scene…
my western nest 