Tag: motherhood
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For Cooper: tomorrow is your due date
Tomorrow is your due date; I instinctively suspected we wouldn’t make it that far once we first got the news. It’s the date I recited before each weekly ultrasound, echoing with familiarity as I watched your fluid levels drop with each measurement. It’s the date I circled in my planner, back before we knew, which…
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“in pieces:” to the mama who lost her baby, for Mother’s Day
Mother’s Day of 2013 wasn’t originally on my radar as a day that would be difficult after my loss. It just wasn’t a day that I gave much thought until around Easter. That’s when the cards started appearing at the grocery stores. The jewelry adds appeared out of nowhere during my evening shows. I couldn’t…
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imposter syndrome and motherhood
For as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be a mom. I hoped for it, and after our loss, I prayed it was still in the cards. In this, as my “rainbow baby” pregnancy with Gracie was coming to a close, I sat in the hospital bed perplexed. Perfect pregnancy, healthy baby…I finally…
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“in pieces:” loving your body after loss
This is a hard season for self-love. Images of perceived perfection dance slightly out of reach as companies work to profit off our self-doubts. Nothing about our physical bodies drastically changes as December flips to January; yet as the year turns over, we are suddenly in drastic need of fixing. Whether it be an early…
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the thing i should not say
Potty words. Every preschooler knows them; these are the words we can only say in the bathroom. And without trying too hard, I can think of a few extra-bad potty words. Ones that I can’t say here, or in front of my kids, and I try not to say ever. Most have 4 letters exactly.…
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i’m thankful for you
One chaotic Saturday, amidst lunchtime cartoons with macaroni and cheese, my toddler was soggy and drowsy from swim class. I, on the other hand, was bustling around at a breakneck pace, preparing for a party we were hosting later in the evening. You can never have enough food; that is, until you are the one…
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Christmas in pieces: to the mama who lost her baby
Christmas of 2013 was a season that shaped me forever. As the lights were beginning to twinkle, the cards being written, and the trees cut, we lost our first daughter. As quickly as she entered the world, she left. I was reduced to ashes, small little pieces of a broken mama, unsure where to start.…
my western nest 